Adoration

“Worship God!” Rev. 22:9

When life is troublesome and wars rage around us, when we feel helpless, it’s time to seek the source of life. The One who is our strength when we are weak.

The priest bows deeply in reverence to the Blessed Sacrament before he retreats from the altar with careful steps. The flicker of the candles is wrapping the church in a soft glow, enhancing the beauty of the intricate craftsmanship of the monstrance. Golden sparkles surround the Blessed Host. The congregation sits in complete silence. Even the little ones are immersed in the holiness of the moment. I see them kneeling, their tiny hands folded in silent prayer. Their trust warms my heart.
My eyes lock in with the presence of the Holy One on the altar.

I sit still, but my mind begins to race. As if he didn’t know our plight, I am rambling my innermost thoughts and preoccupations to him, all those worries that keep me tense and on high alert. It’s a relief to spill out the twists and turns of our lives and to know he listens. Our life is uprooted once more, when we thought we’d managed to settle down after decades of moving back and forth over the oceans, changing houses, jobs, and churches.

Haiti is in chaos; our home is in chaos, and my children are stuck in a country that is shut off from the exterior world. Gang wars rage around them, with half of the country’s population in dire distress to find food and shelter because they lost everything in the violent attacks of vicious gangs. How can I not worry? The danger is real. We brought four of our little ones to safety, and all that counts now is those left behind in harm’s way. The words of Psalm 23 pop into my mind.

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil.

True. We went through the dangers of war and revolutions more than once. Often, we felt that a peaceful life seemed impossible. He brought us through, unharmed. Every single time. I feel deep thankfulness rising within me, run out of words, and stop rambling.
“You know it all, anyway, Lord.”

I feel the tension leaving my body. My shoulders relax, and I settle into worship, my eyes on the miraculous presence of the One who holds our troubled world in his hands. Breathing slowly, in adoration of the Holy One, my soul quiets. Memories arise of the times I witnessed his miraculous interventions. His presence soothes my mind. Holy calm, and the familiar feeling that his voice will be forthcoming. Time has no importance anymore. Be still and know that I am God.

Then, he speaks words of encouragement, like he always does. Speaks in my heart, washing away my worries.

“Trust me,
Trust me, no matter what.
Trust me.”

I let the words sink in and know they are true. Countless times has he led us out of the valley of death and set us back on the mountaintop. My cup overflows. Only goodness and mercy will follow me…

“Thank you, Lord.”

His few words suffice. My confidence returns, deep inner joy and peace well up. All will be well. All is well with my soul, my children, and our lives.
“No matter what the future holds, I trust in you, Jesus”.
In Adoration, I draw strength despite my weakness. At the time of benediction, I feel hopeful again.

Stepping out of church, a warm breeze greets me. A mellow Florida evening and the murmuring sounds of the water fountain at the church’s entrance. It all feels peaceful now.

Arriving home, I walk to my desk and open my bible at random:
“Worship God! … Do not keep the prophetic words of this book a secret, because the time is near when all this will happen.” Rev 22:9-10

Amen. So be it.